Table talk

Today was a go go go kind of day. Mom told me last night that I had to get up at 8:30am because I would be having special visitors (she even made me tidy the house). So at 8:30 this morning I reluctantly pulled the covers off, and pulled my pajama pants on (I just can’t sleep with pants on… I’m an “active sleeper” and my pants end up getting all twisted around). I made my way downstairs, where Melodie and my mom were already up, and I plopped myself down on the couch, bleary eyed. 9am came and went. Finally 10am came around, and just as I was beginning to wonder where these special visitors were at, the doorbell rang. Maids! Somebody had sent maids to my house! To clean! Anonymously! So thank you, anonymous provider of maids…. I appreciate your very thoughtful gesture.

While the maids were hard at work, and my husband was in bed sleeping off a night shift, mom, Christine, the kids and I headed off to my aunt’s (one of many) house for lunch. My family can sure cook… I wasn’t able to stay for very long because I had a massage scheduled for 2:30. That was a well deserved massage if I do say so myself! I had some concern over whether or not I would be able to lay on my stomach but I managed to do it without any pain so it was a very relaxing hour.

When I got home from my massage, mom was laying on the couch beside a very wide-awake looking Melodie. I told mom to go to bed and Melodie told me to sit beside her so I did. We watched a few cartoons together as I fought the urge to fall asleep. At 5pm I had to go upstairs to wake Stella up (or rather to tell Frank to wake Stella up since I can’t pick her up). I also asked frank if he wanted to go on a little dinner date. We haven’t been able to spend much time together lately between him working and me off adventuring with family.

We went to St-Hubert for supper, just the two of us. It was a really nice treat. The conversation kept flowing between work stuff to home stuff. At some point I asked him if he remembered what to do with my rings (engagement and wedding bands) in the event that something happens to me. I had given him specific instructions one night in bed shortly after my tumor was discovered. I told him that the rings are to be melted down and two identical bands are to be made with the same amount of diamonds (my rings are quite sparkly). One for each of my girls. Which leaves one diamond – the large center diamond on my engagement band. He has special instructions for that diamond but I’m keeping that between him and I. Hopefully nobody will ever have to find out what the instructions are. We also agreed that a living will would be a good idea. I don’t plan on going anywhere but sometimes life doesn’t go as planned. I certainly didn’t plan on cancer.

I have an appointment with my family doctor on Wednesday to extend my sick note for work and also to get a “prescription” for a wig. I have an appointment at the Moncton hospital in the morning for my MUGA scan and then I go upstairs to see my oncology nurse for new patient education. Then next Tuesday my portacath is inserted, and on Thursday it’s my first Chemo. So many appointments. It may not sound like it, but I am feeling optimistic for the most part. I have infrequent moments of doubt where I wonder if a cure is in my future but mostly I feel good about this. I have so many people in my corner. I feel like I can’t lose.


About TinaMuslimah

30 year old Muslim revert. Writing about life between two worlds.
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One Response to Table talk

  1. I read your blog every night befor i go to bed and every day and night i pray for a healing for you ..My daughter Bonnie is looking into being a donar.I cant due to liver disease when 13 yrs old You are an amazing young woman who is loved by many,and i am just one of the many.You asked for an idea of something to do befor chemo.Get a BIG piece of bristle paper and sit down and draw memories.I did this befor of a bunch of memories of Dayne and me , it was great. Fishing, garage sales, swimming,,picnics.etc.just what ever memory comes to your head.or ones you cherish the most.Just an idea from one doodler to another.If you run out of paper just get more. Love yah xoxo

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